Blessings

It's Sunday, I love Sunday's but today I will be taking the sacrament from my bed.
I can't stand up and bear my testimony in sacrament, but I can do it from my bed. I feel like I have so much to be grateful for. The Lord has truly blessed me and recognizing those blessings is sometimes hard to do when you are in the fast world that we all live in. My world has in so many ways slowed way down and allowed me to reflect about the things in my life that mean the most and to recognize so many blessings the Lord has granted to my family. This process and journey that I am going through is refining me, refining my marriage and hopefully showing my children that through faith in Heavenly Father even in trials, hard trials, he is with you he will comfort and bless you.
How nice it would be if we always made the right choices in our life, if we were kind to others and shared what we have with others like the Savior did, then we could be free from hard times or trials in our life. I remember thinking earlier in my life, when I was facing an agonizing trial, "this is it, this is my lifelong trial" and of course because this trial was not my fault and was brought on because of the choices of other people I will be blessed for the rest of my life and not be given any other trials because I have had to endure this BIG one. NOT TRUE.... the Lord loves me so much and wants me to live with him again someday that he is reassuring me with each trial that I grow and learn something from it, so I can teach my family about eternal life and staying close to the spirit, close enough to know when I am being taught and when I need to teach.
So as I pray, listen then learn I see blessings in my life that have been here all along but I didn't recognize. My son's journey the past 2 years, what a trial I thought it was, actually it has been a blessing. Prayers that I thought should of been answered in a different way, I see now the meaning of those answers and understand the Lords hand in them. I wanted to continue to train for a marathon and ignore the doctors advice to get a hysterectomy, I now see that as a blessing. If I had not gone to the doctor I would not have found the VILLAIN in my body. The VILLAIN itself is not a blessing, but because I have the VILLAIN I am able to be more receptive to the spirit, I pray more intently and wait and listen for answers a little longer than I have ever before. I love life, and want to live it to the fullest, I want to thank Heavenly Father for every breath I take and everyday I get to spend with the family I am going to be with forever. Yes, blessings sometimes come in ways we never thought we could handle, but they are what they are...blessings!!