I have moved my blog to www.monyawilliams.com/blog
Wednesday, February 15, 2017
I have moved my blog to www.monyawilliams.com/blog
Thursday, November 10, 2016
Sometimes it's good to sit back and enjoy an ordinary, normal day. It is a treasure to be completely aware of who you are and where you are going. I love to learn from other people, I'd love to learn from you!
|a view from the road|
Tuesday, November 8, 2016
|I don't necessarily love our President!!|
In what has been deemed as the most controversial Presidential Election in all of history, I have to admit I am not proud of how this election has been presented to not only the American people but the entire world; who seems to be laughing at us right now.
If ever there was a time in history we need love, acceptance and inclusion it is now. Neither candidate seems to be on the same page with me on this issue. I'm afraid our country is headed into the worst future it has ever seen. Neither candidate is fit to be working as the President of the United States of America. I remember when I was eighteen voting for the very first time. I was proud of President Reagan and what he represented. We all loved and admired him as a nation-whether you were democrat or republican, we worked together to a make America a Great Nation to live in.
The confusion and deception is inconceivable, the mainstream media has seized from fairly presenting facts. They are now a political driven media, controlled by the candidates and who will offer them the best monetary compensation for reporting what the candidate tells them to report-simply put they are controlled by political parties and instead of reporting the truths. Never in my lifetime have I been weary of the future of America-nor have I ever felt like I was forced to vote for a candidate just because one is less evil than the other.
Today Frenchie and I went to the polls like we always do but instead of being proud to be an American with the right to vote it felt as if we were marching to the beat of a different drum. Tomorrow we will wake up and have to be faced with a new President of the United States-Donald Trump vs. Hillary Clinton-who will win? I don't know the answer to that quite yet, but I do know no matter who wins-American's lose either way.
Monday, November 7, 2016
You Will Do Foolish Things, But Do Them With Enthusiasm --anonymous
Right now I am here, where I am supposed to be ! Boy have perspectives in my life and the way I see other's changed. Living with permanent facial paralysis has given me opportunities to live the life I was meant to live. I don't look back EVER ! My eye's are looking forward with great enthusiasm.
One day last week I lowered my standards and chose to react to a situation. I allowed another person's ignorant choice 'get to me' I haven't felt anger like that in a long time, it didn't feel good and it goes against everything I have worked so hard to change. Although I realize anger is a natural emotion that most of us have experienced, I felt shame and embarrassment for my reaction. Why? Because it is my choice to let anger engulf my thoughts and feelings, I could have handled this situation so differently-shameful? Within the moments after yes--Now? Not necessarily, a learning experience? Absolutely !
I have no control over another person's choices but I do have over my own. Sincere love comes from an inner freedom. One which you are not controlled by the thoughts and negative feelings of other's. Love leads to allowing your mind to be free of the world's view on healthy relationships. I've learned through the journey of loving myself, love is kind-it's living free from the neurotic tangled up messes in our head of what the world defines love as. I have had to let go of my vulnerability and not allow the negative influences of other people penetrate me to the point I lose control of that freedom.
I learned from this situation I can offer my compassion and good-will for this person without agreeing with their decision. If I had stopped, taken time to think perhaps this person is having a bad day, or that they simply see things different than I do I could have avoided that useless anger I felt. Perhaps this would have made a difference in their life and I know for sure it would have in my own life.
My love would have still been sincere and their point of view still validated but without the bitterness I felt. One thing I have learned is that what others do with the love I have to offer is on them, not me. All I could have done differently was to make that simple offering. I can love even as I disengage from tacky entanglements, wishing people well even if I need to step back from them.
Sunday, November 6, 2016
|He understands more than I realized|
On November 2nd 2016 the Chicago Cubs made history. 106 year's have come and gone since the Cubbie's won a World Series.
Frenchie and I were on the edge of our seats watching the 7th game of the World Series. I told him I wonder how many people actually had a heart attack tonight--sounds crazy? Not really if you watched this history unfold before your eyes you know exactly what I am talking about. Sports announcers, and social media made this fact very clear several times proclaiming if you have a heart condition you should use caution watching the game.
Going into overtime we watched as fans from both Chicago Cubs and Cleveland Indians were biting their nails, sitting on the edge of their seats, covering their eyes and some watching with blinders on as they tuned out all worries of the world to see the ending of the great Bambino Curse. A win for either side was going to make history Cleveland Indians have not had a win for over 60 years. Frenchie and I would have been happy for either team, but watching grown men cry, and embrace each other was touching and gave hope for people to NEVER GIVE UP.
As with all games, there has to be a winner and a loser. I knew with thousands of people watching half would leave very happy and half would leave very sad-but all would leave completely exhausted as they cheered on their team. Knowing Dr. Kreymerman is from Cleveland I began texting him-needless to say he went to bed disappointed. I was very impressed with the classy response from the Cleveland Indians manager Terry Francona-who has never lost a World Series Game -- he gave a very compelling speech in congratulating the winning Cubs team.
Days after the game ended Chicago Cubs fans across the nation are celebrating I imagine they will be honoring this win for years to come. Frenchie and I attend the spring training games every year here in Arizona-with that being said....Arizona for the most part are all Cubbies fans. They maintained a 'never give up' demeanor throughout the entire season and it paid off--Congratulations are an understatement-they deserved to feel proud and grateful for this historical win.
|The Winning Game Was Played In Cleveland-|
But Wrigley Field In Chicago Was Full of Cubs Fans
Saturday, November 5, 2016
Abraham Lincoln inspirationally asked the question:
"What is your life for?"
and answered his own question with this answer:
"It is for you."
I ask "Do you love your life?"
A few months ago I bought front row seats for Hilary Weeks concert, two weeks ago was the concert. I had no idea her Song Love Your Life would be her theme. I love Hilary! She is a woman after my own heart trying to make a difference in the world with a positive, happy attitude.
|Hilary's set was absolutely inspiring|
Tuesday, October 11, 2016
|Me and Taryn, dinner before the show.|
The truth is skinny does not equal happiness or health. I am the thinest I've been since my twenties, I'm also the most unhealthy I have ever been. I know friends who with age have gained weight--it happens but they are healthy--they run, cycle and eat well balanced meals--they are beautiful.
I was recently asked to be on a Q and A panel immediately following the documentary called Embrace. Taryn Brumfitt did incredible research on the subject of body image. She interviewed some pretty amazing people. One common thread that most of them had was they never learned how to love themselves, or their body. I too struggled with body image as a teenager, I was too skinny and 'boobless.' (more about that in my book I CAN-cer vive) Some people are pre-disposed because of their genes to be thin or heavy. It's not the 'fatty's' against the 'skinny's' we are all a part of the human race and deserve love and laughter.
What if I were to say "I wish I wasn't so thin? or I wish I could gain weight?" If you are honest most people would say or think "I wish I had that problem." I know this to be true because I have heard people say it to me. Be careful with your words, what may be an acceptable weight for yourself may not be a healthy weight for another. When as a youth I heard friends say "You are so skinny!" It hurt, those words were as hard for me to hear as someone saying to another person "You are so fat!" I tried hard to gain weight and never quite accomplished my goal. When I graduated from high school I was 5' 9" and weighed only 96 pounds--that my friends is not healthy!!
When I speak to youth about body image it's interesting to open up for Q and A--most hesitate to ask questions knowing their peers are surrounding them and what they have to contribute may not be acceptable. The few moments of silence tells me they all are squirming in their seats because the thought of talking about their body is embarrassing--
I usually break the ice by asking this question, "If you could change anything about your physical body what would it be?" I laugh and say "I'd change my smile I loved my smile before my paralysis" When the dialogue begins it is magical to hear--most of our youth are not happy with something, usually I hear them talk about their weight, or things they were born with--like a not so perfect nose or believe it or not their feet or toes. I love that one. I remember a very handsome kid in high school who determined the girls he would date by looking at their toes--he needed the perfect shape- no toes were allowed to be taller than another--Say whaaaat? Seriously, toes? You may be wondering why I find this conversation magical--let me explain. When our youth collectively come together and are able to say out loud "I don't like___about myself" It gives everyone in the room a safe environment to talk about these issues, the youth usually walk away realizing they are not alone, but more importantly they are not perfect, imperfections are what make them unique. For some of them it is the beginning of embracing who they are and the endless possibilities they have to make a difference in our world.
When I was diagnosed with permanent facial paralysis, it was devastating. I went into a deep depression wondering how I would fit in, I still have moments of doubt but now I've learned how to harness that silly thinking by allowing myself a few minutes to mourn then looking myself in the mirror and telling myself I am uniquely beautiful from the inside out. Another healing thing I did was write a letter to myself, I scribbled down a few things I needed to let go of and let be. Those unimportant things that were serving no good purpose to my life are now a part of my past not my future, then I burned the paper.
So, I've asked myself plenty of times over the past couple of years "How can I make this a positive experience? How can I endure and be blissfully happy with a disfigured face? Who will I allow in MY circle of trust and friendship?" I cannot change the world, but I can create a ripple effect by speaking out, embracing other's and being inclusive.
**Just a side note and after thought, our youth need to understand they are beautiful they way they are, but they also need to know this is not an excuse to feed their insecurities with food, we are a nation of obese people--this too needs to stop and is not healthy. Childhood obesity is on the rise, as parents we need to teach them a healthy balance of all natural foods--and guess what? It's ok to eat dessert first, once in awhile.
Monday, October 10, 2016
I had a wonderful time sharing Disneyland with Kaitlyn-Brian-Phoenix--Blake-Chloe-Wesley--and Haleigh and Scott--
My legs were so heavy and in pain most of the time, but it was well worth the memories we made. I only wish Kayla-Jeremy-Recker-Ezra and Theo could have been there with us.
|Haleigh and Phoenix mesmerized by the parade|
|During the parade|
|Phoenix loves Woody|
|I love my family|
|Kaitlyn Brian and of course Phoenix|
|Blake and Chloe are the perfect match--ask Wesley|
|I love this ride--it gives so much HOPE for our world|
|I couldn't believe I caught this picture with|
no one walking through.
|My girls-Kaitlyn-Chloe and Haleigh|
|Blake and Brian-the competition is on|
to see who could spin the fastest.
|I love Mickey|
|Phoenix and Wesley loved the parade|
|Brian and Phoenix--|
|I loved this, the maintenance man made this with|
the leaves that had fallen from the trees.
|Phoenix and Mommy watching the light show|