Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Mayo Visit-

Needle for accessing my PORT
I went to Mayo Hospital yesterday for some tests..... still looking at that hip.  It's been a year ago this month that I finished up my radiation treatments.  One of the doctors told me yesterday that Mayo is building a new radiation department at the Hospital.  He was explaining how the new system is so precise, it hits the tumor no matter what size at a 99.9% effectiveness rate, with no room really for error.  This is so awesome for the world of cancer.

Yesterday as I walked into the Mayo Hospital, I felt calm and at peace, until ........ I stepped off the elevator onto the floor, the floor where it all goes down, you know what floor I mean?  The chemo floor, it reeked of chemo smell and made me sick to my stomach, as I waited outside the door for my beeper to go off I was pacing and remembering and wishing Tamy was there to help me "get over" this panic attack I was having.  I mean seriously? it's been over a year now since I've been done with chemo yet every time I get there I am sick.  When I walked into the room my eyes immediately went to a young girl who was having her chemo treatments, she could not of been more than 16-17 years old, my heart started to race as I sat across from her and watched her being injected with that RED dragon.  The nurse took my vitals and said I needed to calm down, I thought to myself "I wish I could, I really wish I knew a way to do that" She accessed my port took my blood and I was outta there.  When I got to my car I had to take a deep breath and remember where I've been, how far I have come and where I am going--


kittrean tanner said...

I never come here. I thought I would stop by for a visit.....Different here than our world of banter in the 'other place'. There is a reverence here. I love you............xooxoxox

The Roussels said...

i love you!! im so proud of how far you've come and how strong you are.