Sunday, January 10, 2010

God has a Plan for Me

Today was a great day!! Usually on Sunday's I am still feeling the chemo in my body and I am usually good to go to Sacrament only, for those who don't know, we attend 3 hours of church on Sundays, 1st is our Sacrament here we partake of the bread and water and remember the covenants and promises we have made with our Heavenly Father, it is sacred and important for me it helps me to get through the week, when I cannot attend Sacrament men who hold the Priesthood will bring it into my home and I can partake of it here, 2nd is our Sunday School we brake up into classes and learn about the gospel, 3rd hour is Relief Society for the women and Priesthood for the men. I usually have to go home after Sacrament to take my medicine and then I am knocked out and cannot attend the other meetings. Today, I went to Sacrament then went home and rested and was able to go back for Relief Society, while I was home the spirit was telling me to go back and listen to the lesson in Relief Society. I am so glad I listened to the spirit. This was a lesson I needed to hear, Erica Garner was the instructor today and her spirit spoke to me like the lesson was written for me. I have been really feeling down lately, the depression has been hard to get over. One of the things I took away from the lesson was that this life is not going to be easy, if it were we would not grow, our lives would have no purpose. We need to be able to look back on our lives and see growth, without any adversity in our life we would have no growth. Just as we allow ourselves to have joy and happiness, we must also realize there are going to be days of sadness, depression and disappointment. I know this, I have learned this, but sometimes when I am going through it, I forget. Today I was reminded and I can see the growth in my life the past 6 months, I wish I could say I am looking forward to the growth I will get the next 6 months, but I am not that strong, I do not look forward to the rest of what I am facing.
I also realized during this lesson that we are all born of Heavenly Father, we are a part of him, and sometimes Satan wants us to think we are of "Man" he puts thoughts in our head that we are not good enough or that we are defeated by our trials, when in reality Heavenly Father is refining us and purifying us, if we allow the trial to teach us we will become more like HIM.
During this journey of mine I am so grateful I have the knowledge that the Lord is on my side, that he is watching over me and that he is good to those who wait for HIM, and to the souls who seek HIM.
Tomorrow morning I face the 5th round of chemo, I have alot of anxiety knowing what I am facing this week, but I also know God has a plan for me.

4 comments:

Kristi & Austin said...

Hang in there Monya.. I hope. I will be praying for you tommorrow. Not that I have have stopped or ever will stop, but want you to know I am thinking about you- Much love XOXO Kristi

&D designs said...

You're a great lady Monya!! I just was talking to Cheri Lundgreen and she told me that you have been to church every week. I love your example!! Thanks for your testimony!

Tracey said...

I love reading about your journey. You continue to amaze me each time I read your posts. Hang in there ~ your awesome.
xoxo

Marilyn said...

I love your insightfulness and your willingness to share your journey with us. You are an inspiration to everyone who knows you... in so many ways beside your courage in fighting the VILLAN......I have always admired your stength...long before you had to exercise it in this manner....You are a beautiful woman and Eric is a lucky man to have you by his side.....love you Monya!