He was diagnosed at a really early age of 16 months. We have still to hear him say "mom or dad" I can't imagine how hard this must be for Jeremy and Kayla, but there are times when he will look at me in the eyes, those piercing blue eyes, starring intensely I know he is trying to tell me something. As badly as I want to hear him speak, I also believe he knows so much, the veil is so thin for him still. Many times before Ezra was born he would stop in his tracks look up on a shelf in my kitchen and smile, or jabber in Recker language as if he was talking to someone, every time he did this my heart would melt.
Recently, a person said to me "you must be so disappointed" I have thought of this statement quite a bit, because for one, not once have I been disappointed, that word has never crossed my mind not even for a nano second, and for two I feel so blessed to know that my Heavenly Father has entrusted my daughter and her husband with such a beautiful soul, he is perfect in every way, we continually learn from him. I realize there are people who do not understand the behavior of an autistic child, patience comes with raising a child with special needs and without this opportunity I would have probably never taken the time to learn more of just how special he is.
I don't have harsh feelings for those who do not understand, who judge, and wonder why we cannot control his behavior or his ticks and noises, I wish I had an answer for those people, I don't understand either--but I am trying to understand, I am learning that speaking without words is something we all should learn to do--a smile can mean everything to a person, a hug can save a life, a note of encouragement can help self confidence--yes I believe speaking without words is having FAITH in a higher being--faith that HE has a plan, a plan for each of us, especially for those who cannot speak for themselves.
I love you Recker Jay--you will forever be in my heart
XOXO Bon Bon