Marathon

Tonight I went to my cycling class that I have been going to every Monday night for a long time. I could hardly make it through, I felt so exhausted. Usually I take two hours of cycling on Monday night and 1/2 hour of weights but tonight I could hardly make it through the 1st class. I am sad to think that I will have to slow down and not be as active as I usually am, I think the cancer will slow me down. I have always been extremely active, running, cycling, weights, kickboxing and step. One of my goals in life is to run a marathon, I decided that 2010 would be the year, and November I was going to run my first 1/2 marathon. I was so looking forward to running and had just started to train for it. Will I ever be able to achieve that goal? I hope so, some day.
Also today I allowed myself to cry a little bit, my mind began to wonder off a little. I have always thought that Eric would be the one who would get sick or need my help, so I have always kept myself in pretty good health, eating right and exercising, knowing that I would need my strength to help him someday. Now as I face this new trial of mine, I wonder if the Lord is trying to teach me to rely on others, especially my husband. Eric loves me so much and wants to be the "fixer" I love that he has taken over and been pro-active in finding the best treatment for me.
Tomorrow we go to the Mayo Clinic and I am a little nervous, Eric will be there with me, I told him tonight that the waiting is the hardest part, I am ready to get going and move forward to get this black cloud out of my body.
To everyone who leaves me a comment or sends me a note on face book or an email, you have no idea what those mean to me. I have put them in a file so that I can go back and read them, I love them, I treasure them actually. My friends and family is what will get me through this with some dignity. Thank you so much, please continue to let me know how you are feeling, I need to hear from you.