Love Your Mistakes

You Will Do Foolish Things, But Do Them With Enthusiasm --anonymous 

Right now I am here, where I am supposed to be !  Boy have perspectives in my life and the way I see other's changed.  Living with permanent facial paralysis has given me opportunities to live the life I was meant to live.  I don't look back EVER ! My eye's are looking forward with great enthusiasm.

One day last week I lowered my standards and chose to react to a situation.  I allowed another person's ignorant choice 'get to me' I haven't felt anger like that in a long time, it didn't feel good and it goes against everything I have worked so hard to change.  Although I realize anger is a natural emotion that most of us have experienced, I felt shame and embarrassment for my reaction.  Why? Because it is my choice to let anger engulf my thoughts and feelings, I could have handled this situation so differently-shameful? Within the moments after yes--Now? Not necessarily, a learning experience? Absolutely !

I have no control over another person's choices but I do have over my own.  Sincere love comes from an inner freedom. One which you are not controlled by the thoughts and negative feelings of other's. Love leads to allowing your mind to be free of the world's view on healthy relationships. I've learned through the journey of loving myself, love is kind-it's living free from the neurotic tangled up messes in our head of what the world defines love as.  I have had to let go of my vulnerability and not allow the negative influences of other people penetrate me to the point I lose control of that freedom.

I learned from this situation I can offer my compassion and good-will for this person without agreeing with their decision. If I had stopped, taken time to think perhaps this person is having a bad day, or that they simply see things different than I do I could have avoided that useless anger I felt. Perhaps this would have made a difference in their life and I know for sure it would have in my own life. 

My love would have still been sincere and their point of view still validated but without the bitterness I felt. One thing I have learned is that what others do with the love I have to offer is on them, not me. All I could have done differently was to make that simple offering. I can love even as I disengage from tacky entanglements, wishing people well even if I need to step back from them.