Monday, April 12, 2010

Got Hair?

OK so this morning, I was looking in the 15x magnifier mirror I have in my bathroom and guess what???? I have some hair growing in.... kinda more like peach fuzz but still it's starting. Of course I asked Eric "do you see the hair growing on my head?"and he replied "um.... yeah sure .... " I said "it's there I promise .... look in MY mirror" I love Eric ... funny guy!!!
I've been told that hair grows kinda funky after chemo, I have always been a true blonde but it looks kinda dark coming in so we will see in a few months.
This must be the day to remind me of my non existent hair, because on the way to the Mayo this morning I pulled up behind this car that had a huge print on their back window that read GOT HAIR ? I busted up laughing at the irony of this morning.
Losing my hair was one of the most devastating parts of this whole journey. We live in a world that cares about HAIR, I never realized how much I cared about my hair until I didn't have it anymore. I had to come to grips with the fact that I am vulnerable and needed to ask the Lord for strength to understand why this was happening to me. I even doubted if I was being heard, and then out of the blue an answer would come and say to me "be still and know that I am God, rise up and listen to me, in my eyes you are beautiful" I have come to understand that I am a divine daughter of Heavenly Father, that he will wrap his arms around me and comfort me when I am feeling discouraged. More times than I can ever remember before doing, I have knelt in quiet prayer and asked him to help me fight this battle and win. There have been times when I have felt small and insignificant during this journey, then he has answered my prayers, he has calmed many storms in my heart that I thought I could not conquer. I will never be the same person, I am stronger than I ever thought I could be. I know without a doubt that in all of our lives there are going to be trials, temptations and difficult times it's part of HIS plan, we can't grow and learn unless we are able to overcome and know that HE can be our constant guide if we will let him. I am HIS beautiful daughter of GOD, with or without hair he loves me.

3 comments:

Tracey said...

Thats awesome! I love your blog and am inspired by your testimony. I still read your blog... I just don't leave comments every time. Thanks for sharing your deepest thoughts and feelings! xoxo

Willi Nixon said...

you really are beautiful, with or without hair!

Anonymous said...

Monya, I love reading your posts. You make me look at life head on and appreciate what I have.
Thanks.