Welcome to the Family

Our sweet Phoenix William Wright finally arrived on Friday February 13. Although I am a very superstitions person, my love for this little guy is over looking my immediate disapproval of Friday the 13th.  Family has assured me Phoenix is going to nix all those myths. I'm not sure why the Lord continues to bless our family with these beautiful spirits, but we feel so abundantly blessed.

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Just one more reason to LIVE HAPPY

What's on His mind ?

Have you ever wondered what God thinks about or what is on His mind? I know he is mindful of us all and have felt his presence at moments in my life when I've felt lonely. In Psalms is talks about His mindfulness of us all.  Boy what a job!!  That means He is constantly thinking about you and me. What an amazing thought—the Creator of the universe always has something on His mind, and that something is you and I ! He wants our lives to be happy, joyful and worthy to live with Him again. I worry about my children, grandchildren, sisters and extended family constantly.  I believe we are all children of God, can you imagine being the father of all the children on earth?

This has been a whirlwind of emotions for me these past couple of weeks.  I try to read from a good book everyday, I keep my mind on positive uplifting stories of people, real people who have endured their trials with grace.  I want to be one of those people, the best way to accomplish this is to surround myself   with the types of people and learn from them.  I have been given an incredible opportunity to make changes in my life by doing this.

So many people today think God is looking down on them, just waiting for them to mess up. They say things like, "If I walk into a church, the roof will cave in!" But nothing could be further from the truth! When God thinks about you, He's not thinking about your mistakes, failures or shortcomings. No, His thoughts are always for your good. He's not thinking about what you did wrong; He's thinking about what you did right. He's not thinking about how far you have to go; He's thinking about how far you've come.  Living  life of discouragement and ridicule takes time to make those thoughts of inadequacy go away.  It takes a constant day to day intentional person to make it happen.  Funny thing is we are all given the same opportunity for change, I believe there are no excuses for not changing,  I may take a short time or if your like me, a slow learner it could take years.  I can tell you from my experience even if it takes 5-10-15 years it is worth every second of happiness the change will bring to your life.

For me it was listening over and over again to inspirational people who have been down the same or close to the same road. I started then taking notes, and becoming intentional in my goal setting. Getting over those obstacles is not as hard as we sometimes make it be.  I had to put my own trust issues to the test--this has taken years--but it worked.  Believing in myself, taking away the negative thoughts not only of myself but of others--took years--but it too is working. For example I have made it a commitment to myself to die with no regrets.  This seemed to be a daily struggle for so long, my past would come up in my mind I would feel badly for how I treated a person, especially someone in my family.  Saying sorry is powerful, once I was able to admit my error and ask for forgiveness it was life changing.  The person then has the power in their hands to decide to forgive or not, but the load has been lifted from my shoulders.  I'm not necessarily talking about huge mistakes most are my big mouth getting in the way, speaking when I should of processed first. Learning my opinion does not always matter, listening is a much better attribute to accomplish.

I know today that God approves of me. He's pleased with me. He may not be pleased with all of my choices or actions all of the time, but when God looks at me, He sees me as His precious and valuable creation. We are all His masterpieces. He's counted every hair on my head, and bottles every tear I cry. I know I am significant, my life is significant, and the things that concern me concern Him. He carefully watches over every detail of my life, and there is nothing too big or too small for His attention. I feel confident in saying I am the apple of His eye, the center of His world, and He wants me to know Him and His heart of compassion and forgiveness, I look forward to the day when He will take me in His arms and say "Well done, though good and faithful daughter, you have served me well."

All throughout history, people have said things about God, but I believe that what He says about Himself is what's most important. In Exodus, He says that He is a gracious God. That tells me that He wants me to know that He is not only gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, and rich in love. If I can open my heart  and receive His love in a fresh, new way. I will ask God to help me understand His unconditional love. Knowing this concept helps build confidence in me.  I  know that God is always there for me and I'm always on His mind! 

On my 1st surgery February 6th I had a 10 inch nerve removed from my calf. He then took that nerve threaded it through the back of the good ear on the left, through the left cheek, between the nose and lip then through the cheek on the right to connect it and pray for results to happen within a few months. During the surgery it was discovered my earlobe was sew inside my right ear. Without hesitation my surgeon took care of that by removing it and replacing it where it should be. There is a risk the earlobe will not take.  I wouldn't call them complications but we did have some set backs.  This surgery was expected to be 2 hour surgery but ended up being 8 and half hours. Ok for me I was restfully dreaming in my happy places, but I always feel bad for Eric having to wait, Because of the unexpected length and details of the surgery I was not able to go home-I stayed in the Mayo Hospital for 3 days.
I was also not expecting to stay the night in the Mayo Hospital but was allowed to come home on the 3rd day. Initially hearing out patient was exciting, words we'd never heard before. The thought of going home after a surgery elated me. Still waking up in recovery, asking "What time is it?" Then hearing "5 o'clock honey" I knew it was going to be at least an over night stay for me.
When I did arrive home, I started to form very large marble sized balls on my left cheek. The distortion and swelling were so bad it made my lip split down the middle. Within a couple of days I was back in the O.R. having my face reexamined.  Those marble size balls were blood clots, he removed those and cut off the right earlobe where it had not taken to the surgery and the skin was completely black. YAY, the surgery was only a couple of hours and I was able to come home the same day.

With all of that being said, life has been put on hold-- difficult--YES   annoying--YES  Surgery 24 and 25 happened this week.  I was concerned when a pink liquid was dripping from my ear down my neck, this went on constantly for a few days before I called the surgeons office. It was impossible for me to see where the liquid was coming from since my head was wrapped like a mummy.  Thursday I met with him 1st thing in the morning, he took off all the wrap and there was not one drip of liquid--Of course the second I got out to my car after seeing him it started to drain again. Since I knew he was going into a surgery I decided to go home and make it back to see him on Monday-tommorrow.

Dump It

 I've been able to keep my mind pre-occupied the past couple of weeks.  Instead of worrying about the surgery I have coming up tomorrow, I've earned an Ipad-and a Lexus car bonus.  Pretty cool huh?  Yeah, it's cool but the best part of it is not the Ipad or the Lexus; it's the confidence and self worth I've developed.  

I've been in situations where I feel like everything is against me. I know so many of us a go through times in life when it seems that we are out of options and don't know which way to turn. I try to remember, anytime I don't see a way out, that God will make a  clear and precise way through it. I try to find confidence in Him, over and over again remembering He has made promises.  I've accepted the fact he is not going to take it away, so there really is no way out; but merely a way through.

I've been studying different stories in the bible about people who felt there was no hope, but by having faith in Him found out differently.
 In Genesis, there was a time when the children of Israel were led by Moses out of slavery and headed to the Promised Land. They didn't get very far before they were chased by their enemies who wanted to enslave them once again. They finally found themselves at the edge of the Red Sea, and it looked like there was no hope—but God! They cried to the Lord, and in Exodus 14:13 Moses said, "Fear not; stand still and see the salvation of the Lord which He will work for you today." Then Moses stretched out his hand, and the Lord caused a great wind to part the water so that the people could move forward on dry land. But that's not all! When the enemy army tried to cross the sea behind them, the water enveloped them and destroyed them. The Israelites were finally free once and for all.

I serve a Heavenly Father who wants to be the hero of my story! He is a God of miracles! He loves to show Himself strong on behalf of the people who seek after Him.  I keep standing, I keep believing because I know Heavenly Father will move me through that difficult situation so I can take hold and believe in miracles again. It's not always easy to do, after all I am human.

"The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace." (Exodus 14:14)

It says in 1 Peter 2:9, “You have been chosen by God Himself.”  There have been times when I've felt left out. I've felt people have overlooked me. But now I always remember, the One who matters most chooses me. I was not randomly chosen. God, on purpose, looked at me and said, “I choose her.  She's my daughter. That’s who I want on My team.”

In my youth I was told “You’re just too tall, or too skinny” But God said, “You’re just the right size for Me.” I have felt or been made to feel “You’re not talented. We don’t need you. You don’t have anything to offer.” But each time Heavenly Father said, “You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are talented. You are creative. You are anointed. You are smart. You are intelligent. You are amazing.” This has taken me a life time to understand.  Those aches were real, but tracing back over those steps I can see the hand of God in my life.  I'm not sure why we hold on to the past so tightly, but today I was able to dump it. Driving home from the Mayo Clinic, feeling a little sorry for myself I pulled into the Land Fill (weird never been there before--it stinks)  I parked poured my heart out to the Lord and left it.

Dumped my fears today....

Looks like a lot of people dump here.

I know so many who have gone through more than their share of unfair situations. But here’s what I’ve learned. Even though life is not fair, God is fair. If we will not go around thinking there is something wrong with us, but instead start seeing ourselves as handpicked by God — valuable, lovable, with something great to offer — then Heavenly Father  said He will pay us back double. That means He’ll make the rest of our life twice as good as it would have been if that situation had never even happened.

It's time for me to dig my heels in. Not allow what somebody did or didn’t do steal my destiny and cause me to go through life feeling not good enough, not talented, not attractive. No, it's time for me to realize I am a child of  God. My value doesn’t come from people or accomplishments; it comes from  Him.  I need to put my shoulders back. Hold my head up high. Live with confidence. God said He will take what was meant for harm and use it for my advantage. 

I'm trying to keep this attitude of faith, praying Heavenly Father  will always give me the last laugh. I believe he's trying so hard to get me where I'm supposed to be.  I may never run that marathon I've dreamed of but  God has something else for me to do. Heavenly Father has opened doors for me.  A year ago I thought I was on a road of recovery, a full healing.  I soon found out the Lord had another mission for me to  full fill.  I believe with all my heart, Heavenly Father brought Nerium International into my life for a new journey, a new peace.  In the beginning of this post I talked about an Ipad and earning a Lexus.  Those are stepping stones, those actually monetarily mean nothing to me, the person I am becoming is so much bigger than any monetary means. What I know about this company is they are going to grow and flourish with or without me.  Heavenly Father knows me, He knew I would need something to build me up. Because my Heavenly Father knows me so well, he knew I would have a hard time looking in the mirror and liking who I saw staring back. Yes, some of you may wonder Why a beauty industry?  Believe me I too have thought "How can I represent a company who endorses anti aging? Isn't that being a little vain?" It's taken me a while to wrap my head around that one, feeling insecure in my own skin and surrounding.  Why would the Lord want to engage me down this road? I felt absolute peace when I chose to represent Nerium, of course that was before the facial paralysis. I now know why. 

I'm a partner in a company who's CEO Jeff Olson has taught me reading 30 minutes a day from a good book is much better than anything on TV or the news stand.  Giving 10% of my earnings to a church or foundation is the only way to succeed in life, and finally true happiness is something acquired when we come to love ourselves from the inside out. His leadership management have also taught me to be inclusive.  Dennis Windsor is a partner with Jeff Olson, but also a true man of God.  When I've had the opportunity to see him, he takes me aside and prays over me with sincerity. Mark and Tammy Smith also a multi millionaire couple with every reason to pass up the little guy or look above or over the homeless man, had a long line of people waiting to take pictures with them Mark saw me walking by came to me took my hand and led me back to his dear wife to ask about my life.  The lines of people didn't matter to them at that moment. I mattered, they wanted to know how I was doing.  I'm beginning to see my passion for life return, the idea of helping others achieve things in their life they never thought possible, makes me smile.  I am exactly where I am supposed to be in my life right now.

I accept the fact that friends, people even family may reject me, but God accepts me. He’s already chosen me for this journey, and He’s the One that matters most. He has a way of working everything out for my good! And it’s always better than I could have ever imagined!