Monday, December 28, 2009

Thank You

Today was another day of chemo treatment, I was also able to see my Oncologist and get an update on my progress. My hemoglobin is down and that is not as good as they expected, if it continues to go down I will get a blood transfusion...it won't I know the Lord will see me through. NO WORRIES. Everything else seems to be going as well as can be expected. Did I mention that I absolutely love Dr Northfelt? I can see why he is an Oncologist, he is loving caring and compassionate, when he left he gave me a hug and said " I Love You" with tears in my heart and and eyes I say " I Love you too" it's amazing how your heart can be opened up to strangers and the Lord allows you to feel just a glimpse of the UN-conditional love he feels for each of us, for others especially those who are caring for you and have your best interest at heart. He hugged Tamy and whispered in her ear the same, and how grateful he was for her to be there with me. I got the pleasure of having my husband take me this morning to the Mayo and stay through the chemo treatment, it was the 1st for him since he has work meetings on Monday mornings, but today it was cancelled, probably a tender mercy for us, because I told him I did not want to go, I was having some major anxiety, knowing how sick I was last time. This morning I cried a river saying I don't want to do this over and over to myself as I got ready, Eric was his happy self saying "you can do this" encouraging me think positive and nothing was going to keep him from taking me (I think he was afraid I would ditch out) ha ha . I always have a prayer in my head constantly asking the Lord to help me have a better attitude, and every time he does, I don't always heed the promptings and I am ALWAYS sorry, HE really does know what is best for us, but we sometimes are stubborn and think we know more....someday I will GET IT.
Yesterday I felt good enough to go to Our Church meeting, it felt so good to take the bread and water (what is called our Sacrament) it is our way of renewing all the promises and covenants we have made with the Lord, sometimes we take for granted the Sacrament, yesterday I listened closely to the prayer and closed my eyes to concentrate on the life of our Savior and all he sacrificed for us. A good friend of ours was sitting up on the stand and our eyes met, he winked at me with a smile and a tear in his eye, after church he came up to me and said "You look beautiful today" It meant a lot to me, I sat there with no hair feeling very vulnerable knowing many eyes were on me, all of them care and are concerned for me, maybe not knowing how to express their love, but that is what matters I have many people who pray for me and love me, and I KNOW it is sincere. So tonight I thank Rich Larsen and his dear wife Teri who not only are going through there own trials and pain (they lost a grand daughter about a year and a half ago to a drowning accident) they always find a way to show love and compassion to me in their own quiet ways. Well Teri maybe not so quiet...ha ha I love her tremendously for who she is and know she has a tender heart that she does not allow others to always see, I have had the pleasure of seeing it, and feeling it. Thank You

1 comments:

Teri said...

Rich came home from church and told me how pretty you looked from where he was sitting. He loved the hat and pearls and purple is our favorite color because of Kamber. Did you notice his tie? Anyway, we are so sorry you are going through this, but know you will endure it well. Hopefully this week won't be as bad as the last round. Know that we love and pray for you everyday. Love Rich and Teri