The bright pink snuggie Tamy bought for me to keep me warm during chemo
Blogging as the POISON enters my veins
Port Accessed
This is Heather My Nurse, cutie patootie nice girl
This is Tamy my chemo buddy today...I love this girl
Today is Monday November 16th, I woke up feeling OK not quite awake and ready for today. When Tamy arrived to pick me up, I started to get anxiety, the tears would not stop as my husband hugged me and reassured me that I was going to be OK. For some reason those words "you will be OK" are not helping me today. I am so mad, throwing everything in purse as hard as I can, I kept saying over and over "I don't want to go, I just don't want to do this" tears rolling down my face, "I am serious I don't want to go today" With every hesitant step I take towards the car I feel my body, heart and mind fighting me. Tamy says a prayer when we get in the car, it helps me to feel some bit of relief.
We are introduced to our chemo suite, where we will be sitting for the day. Heather is my nurse, she comes in to access my port, "take a deep breath when I count to 3"
"1,2,3" the needle goes in and the port is now accessed. Yes, there was some slight pain but nothing more than a needle stick. Now comes the meds, Heather explains each chemo medicine that they will be using today. The 1st med that goes into the IV is bright red and very toxic, I can feel it's warm poison spread throughout my body. I am imagining the men I love in my life entering the PORT and together searching for the VILLAIN to kill. Eric enters first he is cautious and reserved as he makes sure the coast is clear, he then motions for Blake, Jeremy and Brian to enter and together they fight the battle of their lives, knowing its going to be a long day and the war will not be won for months. Today I start the beginning of a long journey towards winning the battle, it's hard and I hate every step of it.
Seeing growth
2 years ago
11 comments:
Monya ~ you are amazing! I love you ~ Heidi
Monya, I have been thinking of you all day. I have prayed for you several times. Your wedding was so beautiful. It made me want to get married all over again....in your back yard! You did an amazing job. You are such an amazing person. I hope you know how many people love you and are praying for you. Thanks for sharing your journey with us. You are so brave!
Good job Monya, I am so impressed with your ability to be so honest about this trial. I appreciate that and hope you can feel all of the prayers coming your way. If you ever get stuck with nobody to go with you please call me. I really mean, I know you have so many wonderful friends, but just in case (480)981-5670. You're amazing
And so it begins...but the best thing about beginning is that you are one more step toward a happy ending! One down....one less you have to do......one more step toward the chemo finish line!
Love you....mm
you are BEAUTIFUL, monya!
i'm praying for you morning noon and night and all the time in between.
loveyou woman.
e
Monya,
I ran into Melody Phelps Peterson's blog today and she recently posted an entry about you. I was/am in shock. I had no idea. I admire your outstanding bravery as you face this trial head on. I, as well as many others I can see, am blessed by reading about your honesty, faith in God, and humor. You are incredible. xxxxxx a big hug!
ps. I loved your bra. Maybe you should start selling them?? :)
The wedding reception was so pretty. I loved the candy, that was so much fun. We are praying for you everyday and hope you will be able to get through this. Let us know if we can do anything for you. My Mom always tells me to think about the pioneers and how hard it was for them. I know it may not help, but I can try. Hang in there we love you. Rich and Teri
I am sooo sorry you have to go through this. I am thinking of you daily. Your amazing!
You are constantly in my prayers! You are a strong woman...keep your chin up! Love you!
Loved your Snuggie ( I just bought K.C. one that is zebra print.. who knew teen boys would love them too?) , loved loved the picture of you and T.S., I am so very glad you have a veteran to go thru this with!.. I doubt there is anything I can say that will be helpful, but know this.. what I lack in verbiage, I make up for in culinary skills so if something/anything sounds good call me.. I make a mean soup! You and your sweet family are in my prayers~Cheri Toolson
p.s. oops! I don't know how to sign out of Sean's :)
Monya,
I've never seen such an great looking woman in a snuggie. Beautiful reception. Great night. Wish we could've sat in a corner and caught up. You guys were just too popular. Good luck with everything. I am rooting for you!
Loves,
Lorie Tucker
dreambig-lorie.blogspot.com
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